about me A loner, although do enjoy the occasional companionship, if you can handle it. Enjoys long term friendships, sensitive, ponders a lot about life and people. Thursday, April 17, 2008
Thoughts ... updates!
[ 5:06 pm ] I'm taking a few minutes off and ... write something ... heh. Been busy with more creative work, I'm quite happy with it actually. Flexing the creative muscles were good exercise, haven't had any interesting work in quite a while now ... been working on websites alone is rather boring, so it was good that I could do a little presentation. Thoroughly enjoyable. Will be going to KLCC convention Centre this coming Saturday for the ASTRO NCA event ... argh, have to usher people to their seats. Volunteer work, huh? To be frank, I didn't want to, I'm a lousy usher anyways ... how to turn down when Shirley personally call you and asked if you could volunteer? Very hard to say no, hor? I think I'm suppose to be ushering celebrities since I don't get STAR STRUCK. Come on man ... I couldn't care less if they are celebrities. So what? Just smile lor, usher them to their seats ... while I ponder about life and the many colours of the rainbow. Ok ... I ABSOLUTELY have NO EXPECTATIONS at all. Is that good or bad? Argh ... there goes my Saturday. Home cells are starting soon and I don't really know where I wanna be ... or if I'm really interested. Ooops. Spoke my mind there. I like how Ps. Sandra joked about people eventually finding their life partners there ... or don't jump around just hoping to be in the same cell as the person you have a crush on. Man ... I couldn't relate to that. I suddenly felt too old to care anymore. If I was in my early 20's, yeah, heck, I'd be damn excited man. WOOOHOO MIXED CELL GROUPS, FINALLY! But ... really, I'm ashamed to say this ... I just can't feel it anymore. I'm not excited. Now, before you start pointing your pitchfork at me, I'm being honest here, and I'm pretty sure a lot of people aren't feeling the same way as I do. So, this is my personal problem. I know the importance of planting myself in a cell group to grow, and I WANT to. It's the decision making that's killing me, we were told to tick only a single location to belong to ... I ticked 5!! So what am I worried about? What if I'm in a group that's filled with really weird people? People that I can't connect? Heck, there are even leaders that I don't respect (hey, I'm always watching, so don't lecture me. Konon leader, but just ain't the example of one. Sorry, can't follow you.) Now, who wants a difficult person like me around? Really? I'm just gonna ask a bunch of question that they'll hate answering ... what a thorn! But isn't it great? Just when you think you're happy in your little group ... and along comes someone like me to disrupt the harmony? >:D Stop being a sourpuss! Yeah, I should :) Getting too old for all these. Ok, just be happy where they place me. There. Happy? Something weird happened to my guitar ... suddenly it sounds good. I know, it's weird. Maybe it's the strings setting in ... umm ... that doesn't make sense. But, hey! I ain't complaining! It sounds good and I'm happy ... for the moment. Can't lust over another guitar till I save up enough money again ... sigh. I'm enjoying myself in the band, still gotta practice a lot more to match the level of skills of the overall band :\ I'm still working on my tempo ... weird, how come I can't feel it when they tell me I'm out of tempo ... I can't tell! Hmmmm ... Anyways, LIFE Retreat is coming up pretty soon ... again. This time it's gonna be in Frasers Hill. Hmmm ... argh, I don't know what to feel about this whole thing again. I keep asking myself do I wanna go? I don't know man. What if it's gonna be like the previous years? What's new this time? Thinking of inviting someone, not sure if it'll even interest that person. Hmmm ... don't try, won't know right? Hmmm ... what can you do up at Frasers? Well ... there's still another month plus to think about this. A lot of things can happen in this course of time. You know, was thinking about what I hope to achieve by end of this year. Man, I really don't know what to expect, because whatever that I've planned will be messed by Him. So, maybe instead, I should be asking ... what He has in store for me this year? Saya tak tahu. Will I do really well in my job? Will I improve my guitar skills? Will I be better behaved (haha)? Will I meet someone that I'll really like? Will I be taken to another level of responsibility? Will I make LOADS of money (hey, can dream, why not)? No point thinking about these things. 0 comments Archives nothing |
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Yawn. Lessons. Maybe tomorrow. Squints. Awe. Things are sweet afterall. Guitar huntin! You want me to sing with you? Kaput. Ignorance. Archives April 2003 May 2003 June 2003 July 2003 February 2004 July 2005 October 2005 December 2005 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 November 2006 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 April 2010 December 2010 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 September 2011 April 2012 |
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